Friday, September 10, 2010

Arrren't You Glad You Read This?

I've got nothing. So... PIRATE JOKES!

Prisoner: So, what are you in for?
Pirate: Arrrrmed robbery!

What kind of baking soda does a pirate use? Arrrrm and Hamm-arrrrr.

What is a pirate's favorite animal? An Aarrrrd-varrrrrk!

How does a pirate make grits? With larrrrrrd!

What is a pirate's least favorite household chore? Yarrrrrd work!

What is a pirate's favorite ivy league college? Harrrr-varrrrd!

Why was the underage pirate kicked out of the bar? He got carrrrded.

Why did the pirate ride his bike to work? His wench took the carrrr!

What is a pirate's favorite Nickelodeon carrrrtoon? Hey Arrrrnold!

What is a pirate's favorite old-school Nickelodeon show? Arrrre You Afraid of the Darrrrk!

What is a pirate's favorite candy barrrr? A Clarrrrrk Barrrr!

How does a pirate order their food? A la carrrrte!

What is a pirate's favorite parrrt of the body? The arrrteries!

What is a pirate's favorite Led Zeppelin song? Hearrrrrtbreaker!

Who is a pirate's favorite singer/songwriter? Arrrrt Garrrrfunkle!

Why do pirate's read Playboy magazine? For the arrrticles!

What is a pirate's favorite element? Carrrrbon!

What is a pirate's favorite holiday? Arrrbor Day!

What do pirate's like on their toast? Marrrmalade!

Who is a pirate's favorite South Parrrrk character? Carrrrtman!

What is a pirate's favorite favorite weather forecast? Parrrrtly cloudy!

What is a pirate's favorite herb? Parrrsley!

Who is every pirate's favorite SNL cast member? Chris Farrrley!

What is a pirate's favorite coffee chain? Starrrrrbucks!

What butter alternative do pirate's use? Smarrrrt Balance!

How do pirate's like to style their hair? Parrrrted

What is a pirate's favorite video game system? Atarrrrri!

What do little girl pirates ask for for Christmas? Barrrrbies!

What is a pirate's favorite Broadway musical? They're pirates; they've never been to Broadway. That's just silly...

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